Waiting in joyful expectation

26 Tammuz 5781

6 July 2021

15:18 Watchtower of Mandaue

Dear Love,

I miss you... but I am amazed that even though I miss you and you have not written anything to me since July 3, 2021 of 16:50 on a rainy cloudy Saturday, that I'm not crying, miserable and depressed today. But from Saturday to Sunday, I was worried, the whole time you never messaged me, I am fretting, miserable, and worried that I prayed to the LORD to release me from loving you because I was hurting all the time when you don't communicate with me. But look at me now, even though you haven't communicated with me, I truly believe GOD had answered my prayers to make me joyful in waiting with hopeful expectation. I believe this itself is a miracle because I am always the kind of person who despairs when nothing is going the way I expect it to be and I don't see the Promise of GOD coming to my view... I was in a very dark depression that Sunday morning, even though GOD gave me WORD to forgive you and confirm my love to you, I was angry, I changed my name from Musab Maryiam Yousef to Marie Yeshua and even though my prayers for Shanyn had been answered for the longest time that I have been praying for her to baptized in water, and finally it happened on Sunday, I couldn't rejoice like I should because I felt like my heart and mind wasn't there with her because my heart and mind was all the time worried for you... I hated it when you left me in the dark without any message or word... I needed answers from the LORD that Sunday morning, HE gave me WORD in 2 Corinthians 2 but it wasn't enough anymore to give me peace, I was still so troubled, but I changed my name to Marie Yousef once again in the afternoon before the day finally ended because I didn't want to be disobedient. I wanted to confirm my love for you by adopting your name and being yours through my identity. But I was still so troubled that Sunday that I began to speak to someone in the channel who I believe could be you, his name is Malay Muhajid. I needed someone else to confirm to me that my husband didn't stop loving me, that he still loves me and is doing all he can to be with me the soonest time possible. Malay, a brother in the channel comforted me with the WORD of GOD saying, no it's not allowed to divorce that even if the wife is rebellious that the husband could not divorce him still. I found so much peace in those words because it felt like he was you telling me those things - through good or bad times, you won't ever let go of me. And I was asking him why you were not communicating with me at all and he said maybe he is planning a surprise for you. And this one statement instantly relieved me of all my fears and worries about you. My fears and worries went something like this: maybe you changed your mind about me, maybe you didn't want to marry me anymore because you are also hurting with loving me. 

How I wish you would be here sooner, I had been worried of how many more days I can endure waiting for August 1 because it seemed like my emotions were taking it's toll on me because I was sad more than I was happy because I don't hear anything from you.... That's why communication is so important but you had your ways of keeping silent and it made me suffer but I didn't want to ruin what you are planning for me. So Malay was such a relief for me because he helped me overcome my fears and worries. But I praise GOD for answering my prayers that I am now joyful in waiting and hopeful in expectations of your coming to me. There were also somethings I needed to see done before I could finally leave Cebu in peace, but these things are slowly coming to it's place as I continue to trust and obey GOD to prepare my family, my work and myself for my departure. 

Things to do to be finished within July:

•  SPA of Denesse being my Signatory in all our Family Corporations (should be done this month)
  
• Meeting of Dean, Grace with our new Atty Christian (should be done by this month)
• Sale of Goats
• Cobe's wife finally in our house, Cobe's wife is a Shih Tzu promised by Mrs Lagman our Manpower Agency because her brother/sister has so many dogs they are giving them away and I want to give her supplements for her high blood sugar and her beauty

Hiring a young man to replace Jun which is actually done today because I interviewed someone who is very much qualified for the job (thanks to my consultants Mading and Peachy)

Hiring a Assistant Accountant to eventually replace Raquel because she is also old and slow

Meeting with my bestfriend Gaily's Mom and Mading and Peachy

Patents or Titles of our Property having results within this month by Sir Leody, and him signing up with Royale 

What happened on 5th of July, Mading messaged me on facebook asking if it's your birthday that day and I said, no his birthday is on May 5, and we have the same birth month. I found it rather strange that she would mention that day to be your birthday and I thought hmmm what could be something special that could happen that day, but she said they are coming to meet with me on Tuesday. So that Monday I was free and without planning, I was led to look for a wedding gown with my sister Grace and when the stores asked me when the wedding is taking place I said August 15, and my sister Grace was shocked because she didn't know we were already in communication and I told her to be quiet about it but I had to tell her because she already needed to know what's going on because she will take some of my job responsibilities when I am no longer in Cebu. We went to SM Seaside, to the store where my sister in law Denesse bought her gown, hoping I would find something I liked. I specifically looked for a long sleeve gown but because of our situation, I just settled for anything that I can have quickly, without hassle, that's within my budget. My budget was only Php 10,000.00. I found the perfect gown but it wasn't 10,000 yet, it can be if I haggled, and it wasn't long sleeves but I can find pieces of clothing that will suit what I want my wedding gown to be. I even found your grooms clothes and sent you pictures to chose from it. I wanted to know if you wanted me to have that wedding gown at that price because I will buy it right away. I wanted to buy it that day but I couldn't do anything yet because I needed your approval. I want to do everything together Love. I'm sorry if I'm already doing the canvass, I need to present you with options before you even arrive because to canvass really takes time. And we don't have much time, I understand that now. 3 weeks only in Cebu!?! Wow! It would take a miracle for the wedding be planned and done within 3 weeks. It never happened ever since, not in Philippine soils! But I believe it can be done because GOD is on our side. The thing that needs to have in our wedding is the Clothes and the Rings. We need someone who can officiate our wedding and I have no one... I am doing all I can to take care of the clothes, can you take care of the rings? The decorating, will be done by a team that Abigail can help me with. But the very most important thing for our wedding is the blessing of my family and I am trusting GOD and you to take care of it... I don't know what you will say to them or how you will say it but I know and believe that GOD is with you and will cause miracles to happen for HIS will to be done in our lives. That's why I am waiting for you to communicate again with me so that I will know what to do next regarding our wedding.

How much clothes can I bring with me back to Greece or wherever you are??? Like how much weight are we allowed to bring in the plane? I need to select already what I am bringing with me to you...

I hope you are well Love, are you eating well? Are you safe and healthy? I wish I can know everything going on, because I really want you to be happy and peaceful, and joyful and not worried about anything but trusting GOD with all things. I really care for you so much... but I understand if you are not ready to reveal everything to me yet right now...

 

I am waiting for you patiently with GOD's grace holding me up... To wait is the hardest, but it is only hard to wait when there is no faith mixed with it because waiting is not doing nothing but doing everything to accomplish a smooth transition of my departure to be with you forever....

I wish you above all, to prosper in health, in your work and in your personal affairs, I wish you to rejoice and be glad because our wedding (marriage supper) has come and I am have made myself ready...and I have found the perfect wedding gown which I believe is what GOD wants for me.

 

 

 

Song of the Shulamite Princess Bride to her Prince HusbandKing :

For one day is like a thousand years waiting for you... a thousand seconds

I have waited for you a thousand years, I have loved you for a thousand years, and I can't wait to love you for thousands more...

I love you always and forever

Marie Christine Yu Yousef

End of Writing: 16:50